So what is the point of the New Year’s celebration? Clearly going out and getting drunk is not great behavior to model for our children. How do we make this evening of debauchery a family holiday? Alcohol aside, the next obvious difficulty is that the holiday requires that we stay up until midnight, which is not something we typically want to encourage our children to do. So maybe, we use the “special treat” gambit and let the kids stay up until midnight just this one time a year. In our family, we follow the Chinese New Year model. If the kids make it to midnight, we pull out every horn, cow bell and kazoo, assemble on the front porch and do our best to make the most possible noise in the darkness. It only takes five minutes, and they love it.

Perhaps the tradition of New Year’s resolutions might provide a somewhat more meaningful way to help the family connect with the New Year’s celebration. Some claim that the resolution aspect of New Year’s originated with the Judeo-Christian tendency to seek atonement. Alternatively, it might be traced back to Julius Caesar, who first established January 1 as New Year’s Day. Caesar named the day for the Roman God of doors and gates, Janus, who had two faces, one looking forward and one looking back. Perhaps Caesar felt that the month, January, named after this God, would be the appropriate “door” to the New Year. Gazing metaphorically through the forward-looking door would, we can imagine, have prompted Romans to begin the practice of making promises for the future.

Before Caesar’s proclamation, the New Year was celebrated at the Vernal equinox, in mid-March, making it a holiday of rebirth and renewal. So possibly, the idea arose that our renewal can be tied to earth’s renewal at springtime. Apparently, the Babylonians are another possible source of the habit of making New Year’s vows, but theirs seemed to focus mainly on the returning of borrowed farm equipment. For whatever historical reason, we as Americans have adopted this idea of pledging to improve ourselves in the upcoming year. Compared to uncontrolled drinking, the concept of the resolution provides a wonderful model for our children on New Years, assuming, of course, that we follow through on the resolutions.

For age appropriate resolution ideas for our children I suggest trying this link from the American Association of Pediatrics http://www.aap.org/advocacy/releases/jankidstips.cfm

So to review, let’s begin our family-friendly New Year’s celebration by not getting drunk. Perhaps, after a family night of games and videos, we should let the kids stay up until midnight and watch the ball in Times Square drop for the 103^rd time on Jan 1, 2010. Let them share a toast to the New Year with sparkling cider. Teach them that it is important to kiss someone they love at midnight. Then collect your horns, noise makers, pots and pans, head out to the darkness of the back yard, and make a huge racket to further ring in the New Year. And don’t forget to work together to come up with some family resolutions that you can help each other follow through on. The kids will be better people for it and so will you. And running around the yard at midnight making noise is really fun.

As always I look forward to reading your comments. Also feel free to add or email any questions or ideas for future topics of discussion to Family Talk.

Thanks for joining in the conversation, Judy

judy@afamilymag.com